That would be a lie. It seems like every year that we do this, it is chaotic. We were snipping at each other, trying to keep B from breaking the ornaments, Micah was whining about having to eat more dinner to earn dessert and Chad and I were bickering over lost ornaments. How is that for a loving family moment? No hot cocoa sipping. No warm fuzzies.
Here is the deal: I am a perfectionist. Type A all the way. I have been for a long time. In school I was on the honor roll. In the work force, I have been asked to come back to every company I left after I moved on. It has always worked out well for me to be this way. Now, I'm a mom.
Being a perfectionist and a mom DO NOT mix. I'll tell you why. I have a way of creating expectation in my mind of what I want things to be like. Well, kids hardly ever live up to those expectations. They don't eat without making messes, they don't fit into your schedule, they can't even get out the door on time without a fit over a toy or certain shoes they want. They don't go to bed without balking, they do not play together peacefully, talk quietly or listen intently to directions, and they do not care how much effort you put into making them look cute in the morning, that mud puddle was just too enticing! Basically, as a perfectionist, I have set myself up for frustration over and over again. I can't keep living life in such a tight little box. I know I can sour the mood in my house really quick or I can keep the fun going by laughing. I know it isn't New Years yet, but I am going to make this a new goal of mine. I am working on letting go. I'm letting go of these silly ideas of perfection and expectations that fit in a certain mold. Life just doesn't go that way for anyone. I'm going to try and take things as they come and get better at rolling with the punches.
6 Quick Thoughts:
Rach!!!! I totally get it. You are definitely not alone in the frustration. Your kids are super lucky to have a mom who wants the awesomest outcome of life they can be given. I love you!!! Enjoy the chaos, hehe...I'll try if you do. Wink, wink, smiley face.
Here's my two cents...
Perfection is boring.
And you are amazing.
Embrace it. The kids are only young for a season and when you look back at the pictures, you will see happy Hallmark-y memories, not because they were perfect but because they are times your family shared.
I adore you, and your family. You bring so much joy to my life.
What an AWESOME post! I think a lot of us mommies needed to hear this. Thanks!
I totally feel the same way. I am a perfectionist too and am learning the hard way that things just aren't perfect! Wait till you read about Luke's 2nd birthday party we had today with friends :) I think you are amazing and although kids argue and don't listen and are pils, I think it makes those moments when they are perfect or doing something so fun and amazing that much more amazing. Think if it were perfect all the time? Those little moments that seem to keep up going from day to day would be the norm :) I love you and your sweet family, and I love your goal. You constantly amaze me. I hope you guys have a very merry christmas!
What a great post. Well said. I don't think I'm as much of a perfectionist as you (my house is not near as cute:), but I do often have expectations that don't go as planned in my head and I too need to LET GO...amen!
Amen sista! Everyone said everything perfectly. And Rach I don't think you give yourself enough credit. You're a great mom with a great personality with a great fam. Life's not always a Hallamrk card, but s it for anyone? And like Carrie said, perfection is BORING. I'd rather have my ups and downs. (Okay, sometimes. :) Ha ha. Love you babe!
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