When I was in high school I was a busy girl and I loved it. I did seminary in the morning, then school, did at least one sport and at least one job in addition to a social life. Now things are just as busy, but not necessarily fun. I spend all my day managing the kids, doing chores and running errands. By the end of my day, I am exhausted and feel like everything I got done that day will just have to be redone the next day. I also know I am going to have to deal with Brooklyn again. Don't get me wrong, she has her swet moments and they are getting longer in length, but for the most part, she is high maintenance. She needs to be held, fed, cuddled, played with, entertained, napping, seeing me, touching me or hearing me to be happy. Otherwise, she will just whine and complain all day. I feel like in the mean time, I have lost my zest for life. That excitement that I used to have at the beginning of the day seems to be dwindling. I remember waking up and wondering what was ahead of me for the day, who I would see and what I would experience. Now, things are so predictable that I am bored. I wouldn't say I am depressed, but I am not as happy as I used to be. I feel like I get through each day rather than really live it and enjoy the moment. Chad has decided I need a hobby. I think I need more than a hobby, I need to find a passion. I have some hobbies. I enjoy doing crafty things, scrapbooking (rarely now), etc. What I am looking for is something more than just a fun little activity. I want to find something I really love to do. Something that will get me excited to do the next day and find out more about. Chad says I will start to enjoy being a mother again in about two years. Well, I hope this will help make that time a little more fun for all of us. So please tell me what you have a passion for and do not tell me it is raising kids, even if it is. That will just make me feel bad. Don't get me wrong, I love love love my kids. I think I have actually devoted myself to them more than I should because I have lost myself in the mix. So here I am on my quest to find a passion. Please let me know what yours is and how you found it. I need to find something just for me to make me fell like my own person again!
On a side note, Chad gave me some money to get some things I have been eyeing lately. Well, in reality, most have been necessities. Like this:
My old bathingsuit became see through right under the boobs. Totally not the look I am going for, so to the trash it goes and I will get to enjoy taking the kids to the beach in this cute little number. If you are looking for a cute and modest suit, I would recommend checking out layersclothing.com, limericki.com or hapari.com. Happy shopping! Also, I got myself some really cute leopard shoes by Guess for the wedding. I had to go to Laguna Hills Mall to pick up part of Micah's outfit for the wedding and decided to see if I could find some shoes there. I went into this little shop callen Milano Shoes and I found these (I realize the photo is cheesey):
20 bucks! I love when I find a good bargain!
P.S. Next post I will explain the poll. I promise!
Friday, April 3, 2009
Zesty
The latest by The Trotter Family at 9:09 AM
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12 Quick Thoughts:
Rach...I totally know where you're coming from. I feel the same way most days.
I don't know if this counts as a passions, but I recently was able to get a free month pass to a gym with some friends - I was totally happier, more energetic, feeling better about myself for that month. Well, the pass is done and so is my better well-being! I guess I need to invest in a gym pass! The only hard part was finding a place for the kids for an hour...being a mommy is hard work!
You do need to find something just for you! You know mine... my photography thing is not only keepin me busy but makes me feel like im really doing something for me and that I love and gives me a break from my kids! You'll find something! And Chads right, in another 2 years you will enjoy it way more... the kids are way more self suffucient and even though they are challenging they just make u laugh all day.
Ummm by the way, I want those shoes, where did u get them???
I don't have kids but I do know how perfect (from the outside at least) your ship running is. You always look fab, the kids always look fab. Since I have none, I can admit it is hard to even get ME to look fab, let alone two other people. I think losing your zest is justifiable. And I agree with somethng you said in another post, which is that if you find your happy place, you'll be an even better mom.
My passion is my volunteer work. I meet lots of cool people, I get outside of "myself", I feel like I'm doing God's work and the reward is limitless. Or, maybe you could get a one-day-a-week job working at a store you love where you could get a discount? How about taking a cooking class with me?
P.S. What poll? I don't see a poll! You know the narcissist within me would love to give my opinion on something, LOL.
Wow I had those same thoughts- that I need more stimulation in my life and I was reflecting on how my mom went back to school when I was young, and I totally see why now! My advise to you- what I do to keep up beat with the same crappy chores is play some justin timberlake or Kanye or Alicia Keys- they always bring up my spirits.
Cute suit & I have been eyeing leapord shoes lately too. Fun fun fun. As far as a passion, running really helps me. I get alone time, endorphins & it makes me feel capable when I realize how much I've improved. I hate treadmills, though, so it's a pain scheduling it when Kev can watch Kaleb. Shopping is fun too, but who has money these days. Oh, and I love baking, but I can't eat all of what I make. I've been strategizing my easter cake for about 2 weeks now...just somthing frivolous to think about, I guess. I know what you mean about life being to predictable. That's one good thing about being young & in school; you're always bound to run into people & make new friends! PS, if you're talking passion, tell us about the poll already :)
DANCE!! =)
Oh and also Yoga is a fab way to feel good and is very stress relieving
My mom said you looked really cute at the wedding, she especially liked your shoes :)
Paint! I love it and wish I did it more of course. When I was in Art school I was immersed in my art now that I have kids they have taken most of my time but If you can just escape into a room all by yourself. Put on some music and just paint. You don't need to know how to draw or know what you are doing...just feel the music and move your hands. You will really enjoy it I promise. If you want I can also do art lessons with you. :)
I love those shoes. I want them, actually! I just read, "I am a Mother" and that made me feel fabulous.
I think having an extra hobby one night out is great! I've been doing my art classes and I've really loved it... and it gives me something fun and extra to talk to Russ about all of the time. He of course does his car thing--and that works for him. :) And i like those shoes-- totally reminds me of our college bed spreads-- you lepord, me zebra... :)
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